Risky Business

So I did attend that Open Mic and I did sing for a whole bunch of strangers. I often make a big thing of these challenges and I really tried not to this time. I think I succeeded. Of course I was still nervous in the car going there, signing my name on the sheet as I entered and sitting there for 15 minutes waiting for it to begin, but it didn’t consume me this time. Instead, I was able to focus on chatting a bit with the other participants before the show. I also made it easier on myself by signing up to be second to sing (the first spot was already taken). But I will admit, that even this was challenging to do. I paused before signing my name and debated in my head about going second, even though I told myself weeks ago that this is what I’d do. It’s amazing how our minds love to steer us clear when we feel fear. However, I stuck to my plan, ignoring the voice in my head, and went second. In one of the classes I took during my Voiceover Program with On the Mic this past summer, one of our teachers told us that when he was in school he always volunteered to be first because he couldn’t stand the torture of waiting for his turn, and he’s soooo right! All my life I never wanted to go first. My reasoning was that I needed time for my nerves to settle and calm down but now I believe the opposite happened! I think that waiting for my turn never really calmed me down at all it just caused me more anguish, like slowly peeling off that proverbial band aid. How I wish I had known this earlier. Oh well, live and learn. I am so happy I went second that night also because it saved me from comparing myself to all the other singers and allowing my mind to provide me proof of why I shouldn’t be singing in public before I even had the chance to do so. Don’t get me wrong, I still compared myself to everyone else after I sang (I haven’t been able to stop that bad habit yet) but at least it didn’t contribute to the nervous energy I was already experiencing.

So how did the actual singing experience go you may be asking? Well, it wasn’t perfect. I wasn’t as grounded as I wanted to be, I fumbled on the lyrics a couple of times and I think I may have sang a wrong note but I believe I did my best. I had fun playing the role of the character I chose and I was able to communicate the story to the audience and even got a few chuckles from them. So on the whole, I think taking the risk of sharing my voice was a success and I’m excited to give it another try next month! :-)